soo according to the calendar on my phone, I'm 5 minutes late to have sex with that guy from work. Apparently we planned this, I even set an alarm.
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
woke up with empty beer can still duct taped into my fists and the word "dove" written on the back of my neck
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit