I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
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