Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
A girl just asked me if we had pregnancy tests and a coworker had to stop me from telling her I was a pregnancy test. THAT is why I don't drink at work.
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
He convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. He slurred every word. I think I found my prince charming.
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
Randomize
