i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
We need to get me chipped asap
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
