maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
You left me a really long voicemail saying, "Hey, it's meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee." and then the rest is just loud laughter
I'm always down for nudity.
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Randomize