NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
Randomize
