i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
Randomize