I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
apparently, "please pick me up from the airport" also means "i got drunk on the flight and need to give you roadhead in broad daylight"
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
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