i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
It feels like I shit a light bulb that shattered on the way out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
I think that's the first time i've seen 'you look like an ugly version of my ex' work as a pickup line
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
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