We won't sleep together?
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
I just tried to pass the bowl to my dog for 2 minutes before I remembered she isn't human. It is 7:27 am.
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
Randomize
