dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
our new exchange student wants to hear all about America's greatest politician, "Oprah." it's gonna be a long fucking day
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
The text I got from my boyfriend this morning: "babe, I'm not mad because I know you were drunk, but you kissed 3 guys last night and I wasn't one of them".
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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