I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
I don't know what else is in your wedding gift, but I just pulled out a pair of handcuffs in front of her grandmother.
Also a whip and a blindfold. Don't be a bitch, enjoy it!
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
Randomize
