it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
Yeah well I just ate cereal out of a muffin pan with a fork. I'll flip a coin as to who has to tackle that pile of dishes we've neglected for 3 weeks.
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
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