I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
I've only been home four days and my parents' cleaning lady already wrote down the number to AA and told me she's praying for me.
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
false alarm, still single
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
Randomize