And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
do herpes really smell.
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After throwing up in a tequila bottle on my nightstand (still not sure how she did that) she asked if she could slip into something more comfortable.
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
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