Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
wakey wakey hands off snakey
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
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