Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
You're having sex and i just smoked and made oatmeal...i'll give you some time to be jealous
If you dedicate your next bite to me, I'll dedicate my first orgasm to you.
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
Yeah, I probably need some combination of electric shock, massive quantities of LSD, and enough couch time time to make Woody Allen say "Enough".
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
i texted "amiibo vore" to my insurance agent instead of someone else. do you think they'll raise my rates out of disgust?
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
Randomize