Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Randomize
