I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
Friends don't let friends put redi whip in their wine
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
Bro, I live in a constant state of existential dread and moderate ennui. The prospect of cosmic horror doesn’t faze me that much.
Randomize
