Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
So the doctor told me that I am starting to showing the early signs of liver cirrhosis. Thank you Jack Daniels for making the first 26 years of my life awesome.
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
wow bdsm is so cute
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
Randomize
