That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
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I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My dad just said "fuck circus"
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
He asked me how flexible I was and all I could think about was that time I threw my back out putting in a tampon.
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