I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
I'm at the grocery store, it's 10 am and the woman in front of me just bought 3 boxes of wine. She turned around and told me not to be afraid
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
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