theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
The cops are here to take me to jail, so I guess I have to go with them. If I'm not out by 6 p.m., there is some left-over lasagna in the fridge for you.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
I have fence marks all over my body
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
Randomize
