ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
I just farted at work and tried to cover up the noise by shuffling papers around
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
Like I would feel weird too if you just cancelled our wedding, cut off all your hair and started twerking everywhere
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize
