On valentines day I took a girl on a date that I suspect was homeless
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
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