Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
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