i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
i just spent an hour trying to convince my blind date that star wars is better than star trek. help me
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
Randomize
