Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
She posts like 3 statuses a day pleading for pity. Responding positively would be like giving a dog a treat for shitting on the floor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
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