Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
Oh wow. I almost tweeted #TweetFromTheBackOfACopCarTuesday but I didn't think it was that appropriate
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
Randomize
