I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
I got with a bridesmaid and a server as well as put an $80 tab in rum and coke under the name Emerson Iglesias. Are you sure it wasn't my wedding?