my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
either way he was missing a nipple.
Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
I just picked up my phone and one shoe from the man mowing the lawn next to the ice rink. He found them in a tree.
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize
