Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
Is there a subtle way to tell him he needs to hydrate? 8 years of yoga and kegels. He has no idea what I’m going to do to him this weekend
Randomize
