Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
is that a dick in a sweater?
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
In order to get rid of my bladder infections I must give up caffeine, nicotine and tight pants. It's like my pussy is an angry dictator or something
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
Randomize
