Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
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