On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
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