why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
I showed him my bush... on skype.
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
I put xanax in the cake batter
Did you really? It all makes sense now.
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
Randomize
