Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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