I just bought the big bottle of Patron. It looks small. What have I done with my life?
Succeeded.
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
I am the Bobby Fisher of drunk asss puking
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
Randomize