New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
Guess who got arrested for public drunkiness, and called jimmy johns for the entire station last night instead of someone to bail me out? The cop that arrested me drove me home. Win.
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
I'm your Election Erection Connection
I retroactively revoke all sex we've ever had.
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
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