How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
She's too awesome to dump: she gives me great blow jobs and free Popeyes. You just don't burn a bridge like that.
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
Randomize