girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
Randomize
