The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
Charged a drink to your name last night. Thanks for the whiskey
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
35 Disappointing People Who Failed At Sexting
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
25 Adults Reveal The Most Embarrassing Stories From When They Were Kids
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.