i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
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