I got drunk at the beach today. I got the word Badass! tatooed all the way across my foot. Probably a bad idea.
Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish they made helmets for livers.
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
I'd just like to say before I start drinking tonight that not only do I not find you attractive; I don't want to hook up with you, suck your dick, be your "suga mama" or have your babies. Please disregard any texts, phone calls or voicemails that say otherwise..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
Randomize