I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
New invention idea: vibrating tampons
It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
We're too lazy to do dishes, so we're making sangria in a flower vase.
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
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