that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
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