bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
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