I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, I'm getting my ex-boyfriend to get me a z pack to cure the chlamydia I got from my married fuck buddy so that I can fuck one of my students.
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
Randomize