her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
Apparently I've told this bouncer I stalk him on Instagram 3 times. I should stop drinking. I only remeber saying it tonight. early sign of Alzheimer's
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
When i was leaving for work this morning, i realized the neighbor was passed out drunk, with no pants, and a half eaten whopper on my lawn. Knowing that hey..we have all been there before.. i decided to give him a pillow and a blanket rather than wake him up.
Randomize
