i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
The bartender just asked me if I owned stock in Jameson. I've been here for less than an hour and he's already judging me.
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
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