We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
Randomize
