By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
Almost screamed "GO FISH MOTHER FUCKER" at the girl I nanny today. Drunken card games shouldn't bleed into my sober life.
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
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