I'm pretty sure his head is too big to fit between my legs. Worthless.
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
Randomize
